A Holiday Post

There it is, the old homestead, painstakingly adorned with crisp whit lights. All decked out for proper holiday celebrating, designed to lift the lowest of spirits!

To think it only took two trips, actually a trip and a half, to the Wallet Depot for a ladder and two more trips to the local hardware store for a dozen or so strands of lights. It took a trip and a half because I purchased a ladder, strapped it to the roof of my little VW and got halfway home before we decided that this ladder may be a little too short and since I am so bad at making any and all purchases we went back to get a slightly longer version, didn't want to get home and not reach the gutter (which was really in the need of a good cleaning, things were growing in there!). They didn't have one. Well they did but it was fiberglass so it weighed about 50lbs more and cost about twice as much, I took it anyway. Three hours later, eight rotten leaves in the mouth, three near plummets to my demise, one slight shock from a broken light bulb and it’s done! I feel wonderfully Christmassy, I just wish that damn strand on the tree would stop flashing, damn fancy ass lights with a defective button!

I am not usually a holiday nut, but I do love putting an obscene amount of lights on the house and blasting Christmas music while drinking eggnog all night long, wait, I guess that does make me a little bit of a holiday nut. Nevertheless, I enjoy the festive nature of the holidays more the "Go out and buy Buy BUY!" portion (though I guess most of the festivities do involve a bit of buying but that’s mostly booze and ladders (one should note, these should NOT be combined unless one wants to spend the holidays in traction) which are the more enjoyable parts of celebration, well at least the booze is.

So even if you do find the holiday season a bit tacky, materialistic and full of incredibly bad made-for-TV movies why not enjoy the good portions! Portions of spiked eggnog, Christmas ham or goose, portions of pie and then some more portions all of the above until you pass out on the sofa, then get up and so it all over again!

At least that’s my credo.

Cheers!